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Contributed By
MoDaDMoDaD

Written by Glenn Leopold

Cast:

  • Chance Furlong/T-Bone – Charles Adler
  • Jake Clawson/Razor – Barry Gordon
  • Commander Feral – Gary Owens
  • Mayor Manx – Jim Cummings
  • Callie Briggs – Tress MacNeille
  • Pastmaster – Keene Curtis
  • Dr. Sinian – Linda Gary
  • Prof. Hackle – George Hearn
  • Randall – Perry King
  • Henson – Charles Adler
  • Enforcer Dispatcher – Charles Adler
  • Enforcer Pilot – Jim Cummings

Transcript

T-Bone: Why do you think Professor Hackle asked us to drop by his lab, Razor?

Razor: You got me, but it looks like the Doc already knows we’re here.

Hackle: SWAT Kats, you’re right on time.

Razor: What’s the trouble, Doc?

T-Bone: Metallikats get loose again?

Hackle: No, no, please, come inside. Hmm, looks like a storm’s brewing. You kats might have a soggy ride back. Heh heh heh…

Sinian: Henson, make sure that tarp’s secure! One heavy rain could ruin three month’s work on this Katchu Pichu excavation!

Randall: Lucky I’ve already got plenty of pictures for my Megakat Geographic article. (gasps) I’ve never seen a storm like this, Dr. Sinian!

Sinian: I have Randall, and it’s no ordinary storm! It’s a time vortex, which means… The Pastmaster!

Pastmaster: (laughs) Stupid mortals, digging in the sand! I know just what I’m looking for and how to get it!

Randall: Look! Look, he found it! The Lost Pyramid of Katchu Pichu!

Pastmaster: Arise, my ancient beauty! Together we will conquer Megakat City! (laughs)

Sinian: Get to the radio; we’ve got to warn the authorities!

Hackle: For months I’ve been working on a way to say thank you for all the trouble my Metallikats have put you through. SWAT Kats, meet Cybertron.

Razor: Wow…

T-Bone: What the…?

Hackle: It’s a one of a kind robot prototype.

Cybertron: (beeps)

Razor: Cool!

Cybertron: (beeps)

T-Bone: What-DOH! (screams in pain as foot is run over)

Hackle: Careful (laughs) It may have a few minor glitches, but one day I envision thousands of Cybertrons helping katkind, the way this one will help you.

T-Bone: Negative. We have enough gadgets already. Right, Razor?

Razor: Well, I uh…

(ground shakes)

Both: Huh?

Razor: Look out! Radical reflexes!

Cybertron: (beeps)

T-Bone: I wonder what the jolt was? Maybe we should check it out, Razor.

Hackle: The Cybertron will go with you. He’s my little gift to you.

T-Bone: No way!

Razor: Gee, I don’t know, T-Bone. We could put this baby through its paces. You know, see what it can do.

T-Bone: Maybe some other time. We’ll be seeing you, Doc.

Hackle: Wait! The Cybertron’s designed to help you!

T-Bone: Sorry, only two can fit on this bike.

Hackle: That’s no problem. The Cyberton gets along fine on its own. Engage turbo-treads.

Cybertron: (beeps)

Razor: Gee, T-Bone. I hope we didn’t hurt Professor Hackle’s feelings.

T-Bone: Quiet, Razor! I’m picking up an Enforcer dispatch!

Dispatcher: (on the radio) The epicenter of the mysterious tremor has been pinpointed in the Megakat Mountains, east of the city. Unit One, Mountain Sector, check it out.

Enforcer: (on the radio) Roger!

Razor: Whoa, for a second there that looked like one of the Pastmaster’s time portals… Maybe we better get the Turbokat and check it out.

T-Bone: Fine, but the Cyber-klutz is staying behind!

Pastmaster: You have remained dormant too long, oh great pyramid, waiting for me to return with the Jeweled Headdress of Katchu Pichu. And now, the past shall conquer the present! (laughs)

Sinian: Quickly! Now’s our chance to get away!

Randall: No, it’s my chance to get the first pictures inside that pyramid!

Sinian: Randall, wait!

Henson: Come back!

Pastmaster: Oh ancient warriors of Katchu Pichu…awaken!

Mummy: (growls)

Pastmaster: Yes! I am your leader now! I control the headdress. (laughs) Nothing can withstand such power. Soon, you and your brethren will storm Megakat City, and make me its rightful ruler.

Randall: I’m gonna get the Purr-litzer Prize for this shot.

Pastmaster: What? An intruder? Get him!

Mummies: (growl)

Randall: (gasps) Ahh! Out of the way!

Sinian: (gasps) Oh my…

Pastmaster: Destroy them! Destroy them all!

Sinian: (screams) Randall, wait!

T-Bone: Guess you were right, buddy. Only the Pastmaster could’ve coughed up that mega-pyramid.

Razor: Not to mention those mondo-mummies from ragsville. Let’s unwrap ‘em! Bingo!

T-Bone: Crud! Those dust-bags must’ve hit the stabilizer cables! (gasps)

Razor: Come on buddy, we’ve gotta bail!

T-Bone: Wait, she’s responding! I knew the old Turbokat wouldn’t let me down.

Razor: Heh, old Turbokat? Guess it was our new pal, Cybertron.

T-Bone: What? I thought I told that tin can to stay back at the hangar.

Razor: That tin can just saved our tails, buddy.

T-Bone: Maybe…hey, there’s Dr. Sinian!

Razor: Yeah, we better get her out of here before those mummies come back.

Don’t look now, buddy, but those mummies are heading for Megakat City. And I don’t think they’re planning on turning themselves into the museum.

Bus Driver: (gasps)

Razor: Gotta act fast. Shredder Missile, locked!

Pastmaster: (laughs) This time the SWAT Kats shall not defeat me. And neither shall the Enforcers.

Chopper Pilot: Warning, you’re under arrest. Drop the bus! Attention headquarters, this is Unit One in Mountain Sector, requesting backup. We’ve got giant mummies, armed and dangerous.

Razor: Let’s give these mummies a cement sarcophagus. Bingo!

Chopper Pilot: Back off SWAT Kats, the Enforcers can handle it from here!

Razor: Fine. Come on, T-Bone, let’s get Dr. Sinian back to the museum.

T-Bone: And then we’ll bag the rest of these bandage-heads.

Mayor Manx: Feral, those giant mummies are destroying my city!

Commander Feral: Relax, Mayor. The Enforcers will handle this. This is Feral- (crashes) Bring me…chopper…backup…

Mayor Manx: What’s going on, Callie. What do those creatures want? And where are the SWAT Kats?

Callie: Good questions, Mayor. Wish I had the answers.

Callie: Oh, where is it…SWAT Kats, come in.

Razor: (via radio) Yes Ms. Briggs. We’re aware of the problem, but we’ve got to drop off Dr. Sinian at the Natural History Museum.

Callie: Dr. Sinian?

Razor: Roger. We picked her up at the Katchu Pichu ruins.

Callie: So that’s where these mummies came from. I’ll meet you at the museum.

Pastmaster: Don’t let anything stop you my warriors.

Tank Driver: Let’s go!

Pastmaster: Now go find Mayor Manx and destroy him. Then I will step in to control his city.

Callie: (gasps and crashes her sedan) My glasses…

Pastmaster: Wait! Can it be…she looks so like Callista, my long lost love. She spurned my attention centuries ago, but now I have a second chance. This time she will be mine. Bring her to me!

Mummy: (growls)

Callie: (screams and runs)

Razor: You should be safe here, Dr. Sinian.

Dr. Sinian: No one will be safe until the mummies are at rest again, and that won’t happen until you destroy the Jeweled Headdress of Power.

Callie: Don’t tell me, that demented little troll the Pastmaster has it.

T-Bone: Don’t worry, Ms. Briggs. We’ll take care of it, and him.

Dispatcher: (via radio) Attention all Enforcer units, mummies are attacking City Hall.

Razor: But first we better save Mayor Manx.

T-Bone: Nah ah, not this time, Cybertron.

Cybertron (disappointed beeping)

Razor: Now you protect everyone here until we get back.

Mummy: (growls)

Callie: I hope the SWAT Kats get to Mayor Manx in time.

Mummies: (growl)

Callie: (screams) Let me go, you big creep!

Mayor Manx: Feral, can’t you stop these things?

Commander Feral: I wish I could, Mayor. Better get out of there. Did you hear me? Get out of there!

Mayor Manx: My lucky nine iron. Haaaaalp!

Razor: Yes! One mummy, Mega Manacles! T-Bone! (yelps) T-Bone!

T-Bone: Crud! Drop him!

Razor: Too late! He’s going to rip us to shreds!

T-Bone: Then I’ll just have to scrape him off! Uh…think I can bring her down…

T-Bone: What the…our jet’s down and that thing’s still up?

Razor: No…something’s happening!

Pastmaster: Those infernal SWAT Kats must’ve found a way to destroy the mummies. No matter, I shall still have my bride. Too bad the SWAT Kats won’t live to see the ceremony. (laughs)

Cybertron: (beeps)

T-Bone: What the- Look out!

Razor: Aim for the eye shields!

Cybertron: (beeps)

Razor: He saved us again, T-Bone.

T-Bone: Yeah…is Ms. Briggs okay?

Cybertron: (weakly beeps)

T-Bone: The mummies got Callie?

Razor: Easy, you’ve done all you can.

T-Bone: Roger that. Put ‘er there.

Mayor Manx: Feral, do something! That thing’s still after me!

Commander Feral: I’ll try to outrun it, Mayor. That’s all I can do for now.

Razor: (via radio) Attention Enforcers. Aim for the eye shields. It’s the only way to destroy these mummies.

Commander Feral: You heard him, men. Follow me!

Mayor Manx: What, no, Feral, are you crazy? (whimpers)

Commander Feral: You can open your eyes now, Mayor. It’s all over.

Mayor Manx: Ick, it’s all over…my street!

T-Bone: Looks like the Pastmaster’s expecting us.

Razor: Then let’s not disappoint him, bud.

T-Bone: Rock and roll!

Razor: Uh oh, I see the rock. We better roll! Deploy turbo-thrusters!

T-Bone: Yes!

Pastmaster: Are you watching, my beloved? I’m going to destroy those infernal SWAT Kats for all time! (laughs)

Callie: No!

Razor: We are having a bad vehicle day, buddy.

T-Bone: And it’s not gonna end until we find Callie and the Pastmaster. Come on!

Both: (surprised shout)

Mummies: (growl)

T-Bone: Razor, they’re not disintegrating!

Razor: Not enough light in here…

Callie: SWAT Kats!

T-Bone: Fun’s over Pastmaster!

Pastmaster: I don’t think so. (laughs) Meet Katchu Pichu himself!

Katchu Pichu: (snarls)

Pastmaster: (continues laughing)

Razor: T-Bone!

T-Bone: Razor…get the headdress!

Pastmaster: Finish him off! Now, Callista, shall we get married in the present or the past.

Callie: Wait, let the SWAT Kats go, and I will marry you.

Pastmaster: Such a tender offer, but you’re in no position to bargain.

Razor: Hiyah!

Pastmaster: Nooooo!

Razor: We’ve gotta get out of here. The pyramid’s going down!

T-Bone: Would you have really married that little creep just to save us?

Callie: Let’s just say I’m awfully glad I didn’t have to make good on my offer.

Hackle: I’m afraid it will take years to rebuild the Cybertron.

Razor: Take your time, Doc, he’s worth it.

T-Bone: Yeah, when it comes to preserving and protecting, this is one radical robot.

Hackle: Well, I have been working on another prototype. I’d be happy to let you have it in the meantime.

Razor: Uh, no thanks, Doc.

T-Bone: Yeah, we’ll wait.

Hackle: Oh well.

Episode Transcripts

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