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Act One

Contributed By
KooshmeisterKooshmeister

At Enforcer Headquarters, two commandos are guarding the back door. They hear some chittering noises.

One of them goes to investigate while the other remains to watch the door. Suddenly, he’s grabbed and yanked upwards by Creeplings. Then they pry open the reinforced back door of the building with their bare hands (!). Entering, they break into the evidence room and find the severed, deactivated heads of the Metallikats and steal them.

The following day, the SWAT Kats are trying to prevent Dr. Viper from breaking into Megakat Biochemical Labs to steal Katalyst 100. The evil scientist is aided by a trio of plant monsters which he calls “Mega-Trees” (T-Bone calls them “mutant pussywillows”). These consist of a three-eyed mutant palm tree and cactus (which isn’t a tree, but whatever) and a one-hundred foot tall sequoia with four arms. The palm tree and the cactus are capable of firing razor-sharp spines. Conventional missiles naturally fail to dent the creatures, so Razor breaks out the big toys, using something called a “Flare Missile” to blind the palm tree and the cactus. In blindly attempting to hit the Turbokat, they accidentally shoot each other with their spines and kill one another.

As for the sequoia, Razor fires a barrage of Piranha Missiles into its open mouth and down its throat. It’s shredded from the inside-out and disintegrates into sawdust. With his monsters defeated, Dr. Viper gives up trying to get Katalyst 100 for now and escapes. The SWAT Kats lose him, and decide to pass the buck and leave actually catching him up to the Enforcers, who are arriving on the scene. They fly home.

Hiding from the Enforcers in an alley, Dr. Viper encounters Dark Kat, accompanied by his Creeplings. He proposes an alliance between them. Viper thinks it over and eventually agrees.

The "Banquet"

Later, at City Hall, Callie Briggs and Mayor Manx are getting dressed in fancy evening wear to attend a banquet being held in their honor by a group called Mega-Charities.

As she helps Manx with his bowtie, Callie says she’s never heard of Mega-Charities and is not sure what they’re being honored for. Manx hasn’t heard of them, either, but he dismisses her suspicions. According to him, the two most important rules in politics are to never pass up free food and collect as many commemorative plaques as possible, indicating a huge wall of said awards and gloating that “the voters” love him. Further discussion is interrupted by the arrival of a car sent to pick them up.

In an undisclosed location, Dark Kat meets with his three new allies in a darkened conference room with a big table monogrammed in his initials. Dr. Viper is present along with the Metallikats, who’ve been rebuilt and given upgraded multi-weapons. As to the issue of the SWAT Kats’ secret identities, which he and Molly learned back in Metal Urgency, Mac mentions that aside from a few gaps in his memories that he can’t account for, he feels fine, so it seems as though the neural neutralizer put paid to that little plot thread, at least here in Falk’s version. Mac and Molly, although grateful to Dark Kat for breaking them out and rebuilding them, bristle at the notion of cooperating with him.

Declaring they’re “nobody’s flunkies,” they try to kill him, but their gunfire is deflected by a personal force field which surrounds their host. Dark Kat is amused, while an angry Viper chides the two robots for their rashness, insisting they worry about killing the SWAT Kats first. Once they’re dead, they can try and kill one another some other time. The Metallikats agree, and the four of them join hands to create “an unholy alliance.”

In the hangar, Chance and Jake are repairing the Turbokat after their battle with the plant monsters, pulling plant monster spikes out of the jet. Suddenly, Dark Kat appears on TV, announcing that he’s hijacked every signal in the city to send them a message, insisting they pay attention because Callie and Manx’s lives depend on it. At Enforcer Headquarters, Feral and the Enforcer Sergeant are also watching the broadcast in Feral’s office (how is unclear; Falk doesn’t specify a TV in the room).

Unsurprisingly, it turns out that the Mega-Charities banquet is a trap, and Dark Kat shows footage of Callie and Manx arriving at a pavillion to be greeted by throngs of photographers wearing trenchcoats. As they enter a building, the entire thing falls away, revealing it was a facade concealing what amounts to a cage based on the description. The “photographers” throw off masks, hats and coats to reveal they’re Creeplings stacked on top of one another, in possibly the script’s dumbest moment.

Dark Kat challenges the SWAT Kats to trace his TV signal back to his location, then cuts the feed. Ignoring that without the feed there’s no signal to follow, Chance and Jake suit up and fly off in the Turbokat. Naturally, it’s a trap so frickin’ obvious Dark Kat all but said it was, but Razor’s got a plan.

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